As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
