belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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