Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
