So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
We got so high we made milksteak
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
