Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
