i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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