yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Randomize
