it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Randomize
