she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize