There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
