At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
