chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
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