We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
