DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Found your dick twin last night
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
