there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
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