So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
