yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
