Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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