Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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