I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
