I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
