He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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