i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
