Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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