Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
