i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
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