We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
