So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
