THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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