i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
