Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
