I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
