good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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