I heard we made out
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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