good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Randomize
