pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
