I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
