Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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