So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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