I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Randomize
