even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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