yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
