I wanna bring you to show and tell
im holly from the hills drunk
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
