But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
