So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
