Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
