Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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