there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Randomize
