You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Randomize
