Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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