do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
