I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
